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Secret to a Happy Marriage (1436 views)
A couple had only been married for two weeks. The
husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to
go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right
back."

"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have
a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened
the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25
different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different
countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India , etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing
that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop....
but at the bar..you know... they have frozen
glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass,
Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the
freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just
holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie
Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres
that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be
right back. I promise...OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened
the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors
d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom
caps, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey...at the bar....you know, there's
swearing, dirty words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP DICKHEAD!
SIT DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN
YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR F#@KING HORS
D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A
F#@KING BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER...GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"

...and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that
a sweet story !

 

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