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Little Old Lady (1065 views)
A Little Old Lady is being cross-examined by the DA

D.A.: What is your age?

Woman: I am 86 years old.

D.A.: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened to you?

Woman: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

D.A.: Did you know him?

Woman: No, but he sure was friendly.

D.A.: What happened after he sat down?

Woman: He started to rub my thigh.

D.A.: Did you stop him?

Woman: No, I didn't stop him.

D.A.: Why not?

Woman: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Abner

passed away some 30 years ago.

D.A.: What happened next?

Woman: He began to rub my breasts.

D.A.: Did you stop him then?

Woman: No, I did not stop him.

D.A.: Why not?

Woman: Why, Your Honor, his rubbing made me feel all alive

and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!

D.A.: What happened next?

Woman: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and

said to him..."Take me ...young man...Take me!"

D.A.: Did he take you?

Woman: Hell, no. He just yelled, "April Fool!"

...And that's when I shot the little bastard.


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